It was therefore with some hesitation that I decided to post the following, because, well let's face it: who wants to listen to a scratched record? But then I thought better of it and decided to post anyway, so, in the spirit of fun, specifically the fun that I get poking these Pharisees in the ribs, here's something from a Craig's List posting (adding link for credit, but reproducing here in it's entirety):
Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian
Date: 2006-06-02, 1:10PM MST
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.
9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.
7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!
6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.
2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
6 comments:
Ah, it's too easy to do this (bash fish-people), so all I can do is smile and nod when I meet these people. Unfortunately, it becomes mighty uncomfortable when it's family members of friends of mine (not many -- but some). It's even more uncomfy when it's a *student* of mine.
Well, I don't bash too many other people -- I just have so little tolerance for their particular breed of insufferability. Russ assures me that TX is different than the deep south, but he's not nearly as allergic to these bozos as I am so I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
There's a huge difference between Evangelicals and Fundies. Need to become aware of said difference, as it's almost entirely the former here (as opposed to right next to PTL-land).
the Purpose-Driven-Life Crowd is the *vast mainstream* for these folks here. Vastly more benevolent than the folks you're used to snarking at.
I dunno; when I here pre-election interviews of folks in TX (originating subject being the little dance some folks've had to do because of judicial redistricting) talking about voting for X instead of Y because X "is Christian" (subtext from speakers tone that being Christian is somehow implicitly meritorious), that sounds an awful lot like the same disease as the PTL crowd.
And.... 5 or more years in PTL land would give you hives too. I know what places are like when these guys take over: their way or the highway.
I consistently fail to see where you get this idea that there's going to be some great fundie takeover... I've heard the same thing discussed at the bookstore out there, and I always have to wonder if folks out there are talking about the same country I live in. Voting for somebody b/c he's perceived as sharing your values is not exactly the same as tossing out roses for the mullahs...
You could call it a disease of the godless, if you will. I don't expect you to get it. :o)
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